Nerves.

I am so incredibly anxious about starting my practicum on Monday. (Well, hopefully I start on Monday...I can't get a hold of my supervisor and she never told me when she wants me to come!) I will be working as an art therapist with families of children who have been sexually abused.

All I can think about when I think about working there is how I feel like I know nothing. I have been in grad school for a year, but it seems like all of that new knowledge somehow slipped out of my head this summer. Perhaps there is a leak in my brain.

I am nervous that, when put into a counseling situation one-on-one with a real live person, I will become utterly tongue tied and brain dead.

I'm scared that I won't be able to handle hearing the horror stories of sexual abuse that these poor children have been through, and that I myself will be traumatized.

I'm worried that I will fail.

I know that these are all cognitive distortions. Untrue cogntitions that repeat in my head and impact my mood and behavior. The more I think them, the worse the cycle gets. I should know how to stop this cycle! In fact, I will be helping clients change their own cognitive distortions related to sexual abuse in therapy sessions.

To relieve my anxiety, I must STOP those negative thoughts and replace them with the truth.

The truth is this:

I have succeeded thus far in grad school, aced all my classes, and I am NOT a failure.

I have been given gifts by God to work with people, and this is where he wants me. He will help me through the difficult times because this is his plan for me.

I am not perfect, nor am I expected to be, as I am still in training. This experience is meant to help me learn and grow.

I CAN do this. I am equipped and ready, and I am passionate, creative, and caring. This is what I am made to do!

Please Jesus. Help me to believe these truths!